Change

Apparently I've been in too much of a comatose state to even blog. Holy crap. Life has been crazy and out of control lately and I really didn't know how to put my words together well enough for a blog entry. Lets just say the last week I have been an emotional wreck. I'm trying to pull myself from this downward spiral I have become. So lets start with the changes.


1. Gym Time... Its time for me to get back in the gym. No more just running outside, and doing simple workouts at home. It is really time for me to get into the gym. I DID it tonight! It was great. I feel so amazing right now and so refreshed, even after one workout. I made it longer than what I initially expected. And WOW let me tell you, was that a great stress relief. Better way to release my stress than my recent unhealthy activities that we wont discuss on here. So my first change, well one of my changes I should say is the gym, and I think it is going to be an AMAZING ride.

2. No Text Zone (Boundaries) ... I've created a zone for myself. I will not text people who have spoken up that they do not want me to text them, it is time for me to respect them and let them do what they need to do. This is mainly my ex because I tend to text her when I miss her and that is about everyday but no no no I have not text her everyday, Ha! I'm sure I would be blocked right now if I'm not already. But this is more of a new thing for me to just let go of those who don't want to talk to me or don't want to return my texts. I get so bent out of shape by it and it creates internal problems. This is going to be something that will be very hard for me and I will probably fuck up... and It's not like i'm trying to be disrespectful when i text either i'm just hoping maybe one day you will reply. That isn't fair though... I can do this.

3. Calorie Counting... I have decided to start counting my calories. Today is the first day and I have set a 1,200 calorie goal for each day. My chicken, rice, and green bean mashup is 360 and I will have that for Lunch and Dinner most days. I WILL prepare my meals for the week, and start doing better.

4. Reconnect... WITH those old friends that want to be in my life and I want to be in theirs. I am really going to start making better efforts to see people who want to see me and that I want to see as well but in the past maybe have not made enough time for.

5. Jobs... Don't complain if  you're not going to make a change! New Philosophy. Change is occurring- I PROMISE.



So there are a few changes I am going to start making... some big, some small. But in the end I think myself and everyone around me will be a lot happier. I have to let go of my past and live for my future. I am sick to my stomach on a daily bases worrying about my ex. And I hate the term ex because its so negative. And I don't think of her in a negative way. I just wish I had answers, and I wish I knew if she was okay. I thought it was hard with the lack of control I had when we were together when it came to her health problems. Now I don't get to hear anything.


Changes.... I have to make them.



Until Next Time,

-C